Gay

So...I may or may not have kissed a gay man. Correction, I was kissed by someone that may or may not be gay. Oops...He tried to kiss me and I turned away and said that I didn't want to kiss on the first date especially since I met him the day before...right, ok so I didn't explain how I met him. K so Thursday I was at Five Guys Burgers and Fries with my roommates and this guy came and sat at the table next to us and started talking to us. Then he was kinda just talking to me and asked me on a date and asked for my number so I gave it to him. Then we went on a date last night (Friday) (note: all day I was stressin because he is 26 and sounds gay but wanted me on a date so I was like WTF!!!) Anyway, we went out for salad (ya still sounding gay) (oh and he talks gay too...like he sounds like more of a girl than I do--not his voice just the way he talks) then we went to some music lounge thing and watched some performances then we drove some high dude around for awhile and then we went back to his place (oh and all except the salad part we were with his roommate who is 20 but looks 17 lol and his name is Jake but my date, Matt, calls him Jakey). Ya so thats how that went. Anyway, told the guy no and he did it anyway. I'm weak, I couldn't not kiss back! UGH what is it with me and gay guys!!!! Then we went out to ice cream and I made him take me home cuz I was tired. And I think we're doing something tonight...he was like, "so this is weird because I met you yesterday but I have this huge crush on you..." and kept saying I was super pretty and blah blah blah which of course I like lol but he's gay! :( WHY!!!!! Anyway, love ya girls. :)

UPDATE, HUGE UPDATE!!!

Hello ladies!
How are you enjoying your summers? I hope that all is going well. I can't believe that you went on a taco bell run and didn't even think of me! Crazy how jealous I am of those boys for getting to spend more time with my best friends than even I do!!!
There are a few things that are worth my mentioning now. 1. Bergen, I can't believe that you felt the need to share my I enjoy cuddly boys txt with everyone! Especially Allen!!! Danielle, I was right! He was upset with me, and that was why. Last night I had a series of lengthy txts from him explaining why he hasn't been talking to me lately. The boy went three freaking days without talking to me! I am attached to him! I enjoy having a friend that wants to talk to me and will go through lengths to initiate said talks! I haven't decided how I feel about him and it wouldn't really matter anyway because of the long distance gig we got goin on here. 2. K so Allen hadn't been txting me so I txted him and was like wtf is wrong with you and why don't you talk to me and after taking forever to get him to answer this is what I got in the middle of the night:
You did nothing wrong and have nothing to be sorry about!! I think I'ma be honest with you, I hate it cause I feel stupid and "emotional" but whatever. I'm growing attached, I like you, your pretty much amazing...lol its probably obvious, and I didn't really want to tell you cause you don't seem like all that much of a "relationship" person and I don't want to make it awkward, I don't want you to think of this like you did with tim at all, liking you for years and such and being weird, but I do and its not a big deal, I don't know what to think about me falling for you...I have a hard time with the distance thing anyways and the other night they mentioned your liking cuddly boys txt, and it just got me thinking that you being with all these guys, I wouldn't stand much of a chance anyways, so not txting you as much is kinda my way of weening myself, I guess you could say...its stupid...
K so here I am getting a confession out of this boy of how much he likes me, and Idk what to say! I do care about him and think he's great but he lives in another state and I suck balls at relationships much less long distance ones! So we had a long chat about that...
3. Saturday night Grayson decided to remember that Hailey lives in Provo. He is living here too to work on his grandpa's farm and so he asked me to chill with him. I lead a sad and lonely life so of course I said yes. K but I actually got nervous to go out with him! I have liked this boy since he saved our butts at the Papa Roach concert, and last year when we had our one night stand, I liked him and got all excited about that and then it was like nothing ever happened between us. The boy is a bigger player than I am! So I'm thinking that I'd go into the night and we'd just chill, and if it came to kissing it'd just be ncmo. Well, I still like the stupid boy and it kills me that he doesn't talk to me! We had a lot of fun...A LOT OF FUN, lol and he hasn't talked to me since! Ok so I txted him because I wanted to (weird, I never txt first I know) but he only txted like three messages and then just stopped. Ugh I want to go out with him again because I miss being held with guys and I like it a lot!
I have a problem!!! Stupid boys are killing me!!!!!!
Anyway, that is all. Love you all tons. :)